Did you feel a disturbance in the sewing force yesterday, friends? Perhaps it felt like 1000 gasps of fashionable horror or riotous laughter emanating from a certain office desk in Texas. You see, yesterday Burda released their latest collection of plus sized patterns. It is called the “Gallery Tour” collection and purports itself as an artistic collection for the curvier among us.
Burda is infamously hit-or-miss in its plus sized offerings, but this is a truly bizarre collection of patterns. The curvy artist in these photos is absolutely gorgeous, but is also one pair of neon high tops away from staging a Punky Brewster revival. There are shoulder zippers and hip ruffles. There are sweatshirts worn with fancy, silk skirts. There are–brace yourselves–fabric tails.
Let’s start ourselves out gently, shall we? This is the Mermaid Dress, a body-hugging dress with a mid-calf flounce and lace sleeves. Truthfully, I kind of love it. Sure, the lace sleeves look like leftovers from a child’s witch costume, but the actual dress silhouette is totally working for me! With a shortened sleeve and gorgeous floral rayon, this could be a fabulous 30’s-esque dress.
It does warn of darker trends in this collection, however…
For example, the crazy pants fabric matching of Burda’s Track Jacket. At its core, this is not a horrible pattern. Sure, I haven’t actually needed a track jacket since my ill-fated days in high school athletics, but if the activewear whim struck, I would give this jacket a try. Only, never not ever, would I make it with silk floral sleeves and striped bands. Y’all, where is this model even going? Do art show openings also double as weightlifting tournaments? If I attend your next cocktail party in a silk skirt and track jacket, please check me for brain injury/alien body snatching.
Providing more evidence for the theory that Burda believes artists regularly moonlight as athletic trainers, we have the Quilted Sweatshirt. What separates this from your average sweatshirt pattern? Absolutely nothing…except the left shoulder zipper! Yes, my dears, it’s just what every girl needs: a cozy, oversized sweatshirt with easy left shoulder access. Burda knows that left shoulder itches don’t just happen to straight-sized women, after all. Curvy women also have awkward skin maladies!
Gone are the days of itching your shoulder through your shirt or later, in the privacy of you own home. Unzip the neckline on this baby and–boom!–collarbone is on full display. Well, part of it anyhow. If you need to unleash your right shoulder, Burda is utterly unable to help.
Next up, we have two classic plus size patterns, the Drawstring Pants and Cowl Neck Blouse. In this case, classic doesn’t mean timeless, but rather the same old swill pattern companies routinely try to pawn off on larger women. We at the Collective know that being a size 12+ doesn’t mean we’d like to hide our bodies in tentlike shapes, but the fashion industry has yet to get the message. Proof: this outfit. They’ve taken a perfectly serviceable pair of yoga pants and insisted that plus sizes will want them in silk and satin! No. Who is this artistic woman who wants to wear silk, but demands the ability to do downward-facing dog at any moment? How impractical! Burda, plus-sized women do like to change clothes in between exercise classes and cocktail parties, I promise you. Stop trying to make silk exercise pants happen!
In other news, the top is cute-ish, I suppose. The lack of a dart leaves me fearing what it looks like untucked from that oh-so-fancy elasticized satin waistband. Plus, an asymmetrical cowl neck sounds like one of those “design elements” that I’d be fiddling with all night, in the vain attempt to center it over my bust. Asymmetry may be so hot right now, but it’s really not a good look for my lady lumps.
Speaking of asymmetry gone horribly, horribly awry: the Godet Dress. No, the busy print of that dress is not playing with your eyesight, there is a tail attached to the front of this dress. Look, Burda. you can call it a godet and make it out of silk all you want, but I’ve got your number. It looks like the dress came out with a prehensile fabric tail, where its right side should be. Let’s not even talk about the removable cuffs and collar. Trying to iron those into place is the stuff my nightmares are made of. You know, besides the ones in which I’ve suddenly grown a floral print front tail…
Oh, goody. Just what I needed, Burda. Another floral print track jacket, for the days my other one wasn’t dressy enough! Why, with that added collar and floral panel, this is ideal opera attire. Too many times, I’ve been at a Carmen performance, positively miserable because I wasn’t wearing enough athletic mesh. Never again!
On that note, are these track jackets so flimsy that an additional sweater is required? Perhaps the green one around her shoulders is just artistic whimsy. Oh, plus-sized artist, your unconventional layers are so visionary.
Run for the hills! The tail, it has multiplied!
For a dressier take on curvy artists, Burda took a pencil skirt pattern and added two blousy tails panels, to form the Draped Skirt. I actually like this one on the model, but that might be thanks to the busy print hiding those panels. I suspect this is another attempt on Burda’s behalf to help us “camouflage our problem areas,” which is a fashion pet peeve of mine. Plus-sized designs should be just as thoughtful and well-fitting as straight-sized offerings. Throwing extra fabric at our figures is not only unfashionable, but insulting! I really need to see this one made up in a solid fabric, before passing judgment on its design success, however. For now, I am skeptical…
For Burda’s final offering, we get the ideal garment to pair with those floral track jackets: the Zipper Pencil Skirt! At first, I loved this skirt, with its modern take on my beloved pencil skirt pattern. Then, I looked harder. In addition to the full separating metal zipper down the front and two zipped pockets, there’s also an invisible zipper in the back. You know, in case this skirt needs to completely disassemble at any moment.
Wait. Stop the presses!
Just call me Nancy Drew of Burda, y’all, because I know Ms. Curvy Artist’s deep, dark secret. She’s a superheroine! That is the only explanation for why a woman would need an entire wardrobe of stretchy, completely unzippable, silk workwear. It’s not that her left shoulder is often itchy or that she hates regular waistbands, at all. She is at the whim of the innocent and victimized. When trouble calls, girlfriend can’t wait to unbutton a fly! She has a city to save!
It all makes so much sense now.
(Except for the tails, which still boggle my mind.)
However, if you’re like me and don’t have a superheroine alter ego, this might not be the collection for you. Many of these looks are on-trend with some RTW collections and new independent patterns, but not my personal style. Luckily, our lovely Laurence found a sneak peak of the next round of Burda Plus patterns and they look quite a bit more promising. Don’t worry, this intrepid reporter blogger will be back with the inside scoop on those, when the time comes.
SO funny! I’m so confused by Burda. All I can do most of the time is shake my head at some of the styles and think “it must be a European thing….” but I doubt it. This collection in particular is just awful. Some of the patterns are fine, but the fabrications they chose make no sense. You can’t see most of the design lines with the busy prints. Burda does seem to go back and forth between shapeless sack and some really wonderful designs for their Plus collections. I’ve found many that I really want to make; it just takes a bit of looking.
It’s seriously insulting that they don’t just simply offer their standard pattern collections in plus sizes. There’s no need for a special collection of weird designs for the curvy girls–we like a lot of the standard-size designs and would totally sew them, if only Burda would provide the patterns. And hey, Burda, we’d totally do them justice.
There’s no reason a customer segment shouldn’t criticize a company’s product when it’s clearly aimed at that segment but doesn’t meet their needs/expectations/wants. Companies are free to put out whatever product they think their customers want, but those customers are also free to reject those products if they don’t actually want or like them. And Burda should be paying attention. McCall’s certainly is, and it’s only done good things for that company so far.
It is not harder to draft patterns for larger sizes. It just isn’t. It all comes down to the right calculations. Besides, most pattern companies use pattern drafting software that does everything for them. The industry claiming otherwise–while at the same time offering larger-sized patterns in styles that no one actually wants–is just lazy, not to mention mind-bogglingly hypocritical. And we know it, and we’re not buying it anymore–or the awful patterns.
I have no complaints about the Plus models that Burda uses. Models are models, regardless of their size, and the fashion industry, even the curve-friendly one, has a certain “preferred Plus-size shape” and they hire models accordingly. It’s a tough industry to change. But that’s why the Curvy Sewing Collective is so awesome!
I was reading this aloud to my husband and we were in hysterics. While we were making a grocery list, he was doodling on a picture our 3 year old drew. He turned to me and said, look! I think I will submit this to Burda! It’s got everything they like – zippers, tails, and flowers!
Mary,
I love your blog and envy your skills and knowledge about sewing (and aspire to it too, it’s not all bitterness nursed over a single malt scotch!) but this article seems to be snarky for the sake of it.
All your critiques of the pattern-making seem to be spot on, but you don’t stop there. You are against this styling. The track jackets (we call them bomber jackets) are on trend here in Australia, and I have coveted a few RTWs (with silk panelled sleeves no less!) priced at about $200, way out of my range. The possibility of making something for myself (which to my nooby eyes looks simple-ish) feels good.
No, the style here isn’t in your wheelhouse (btw yes the theatre curtain skirt is fugly) but some of us do like to dress this way. For instance the silky yoga pants would be something I’d be attracted to – they may never look good on me, but that’s my business surely.
Perhaps this is ungenerous of me and I’ve completely misread your piece (due to my no knowledge of actual sewing ), in which case I apologise.
***The rest of us aren’t stupid; the difficulty of designing patterns for heavier customers is extraordinarily difficult (and if you don’t think it is, then you try it)***
But that’s just it! Plus sized sewists already DO have to redraft most of the patterns we buy! We draft, alter and redesign in at least some way almost everything to make it fit and wearable.
“…the difficulty of designing patterns for heavier customers is extraordinarily difficult…”
I call B.S. on this. Creating a pattern has two basic tasks:
1. Creating a design.
We’re sick of the tents that Burda and so many other companies call plus size clothing. We want the same styles as the smaller sizes. Don’t overthink this, Burda, it’s not complicated. GIVE US THE SAME STYLES. Do not create new “styles” for plus size customers. We hate them and we will mock them mercilessly.
2. Fitting the garment onto a model and grading into different sizes.
It’s the same task that’s done for regular sizes, but with a larger model. Yes, this does mean fitting another model and doing another round of grading. Don’t like doing this step twice? Then skip the smaller sizes and just create the pattern for plus sizes.
“The rest of us aren’t stupid; the difficulty of designing patterns for heavier customers is extraordinarily difficult (and if you don’t think it is, then you try it) so why would we deliberately invest in the plus size market when it has the reputation of being gratuitously fractious and unkind?”
I’m calling BullS%$t. What makes these patterns for plus customers harder to design.
The tails? Good clothing design is the same for plus sizes as for smaller sizes. AS to the fractious and unkind remark, I find most plus size sewers immensely gracious and grateful when a pattern company gets it right. And to this collection of ridiculousness all I can say is Oh Honey No!
Ha! Thanks, I had to read some of this out loud to my husband. He knows my love/hate affair with Burda and got quite a laugh out of the new line and your writing!
They really need to just extend their “regular” sizes. They all stop at what, a US 10? They jump over to “plus size”, and they are not kidding. When I follow my dimensions to size in their plus sizes, I end up with something my whole family can wear, at once. I understand that going from a size 10 and continuing to alter it doesn’t work. But, come on!
I totally agree! Why can’t we have the same styles, just in our sizes? The vast majority of them would look great on plus sizes, so I’m not sure why they think we want to wear totally different things.
Jalie seems to have mastered the “extraordinarily difficult” task of offering plus patterns in the exact same styles (and envelope) as non-plus. And having made a number of them personally, I can say … it works. And they offer far more than a basic tee.
This is what I love about pattern companies like StyleArc, HotPatterns, Ottobre, and Jalie–they offer the same extended size range for ALL of their patterns. We get to choose what we want to sew rather than having it dictated by someone else.
I appreciate someone taking the piss out of the Burda collections, and the McCalls and so forth BECAUSE they are listening, they (Burda, McCalls, anyone else left?) are reading the blogs and especially a blog with as many followers as this one.
It’s not whining if it gets the job done. Go gals go!
Love it. Lladybird’s vogue posts are personal favorites, and it’s great to have one that deals more closely with my own pattern and fit issues. I love how some pattern designers feel that draping our curves in swaths of extra fabric will make them miraculously vanish. Know what? We love our curves, design should play them up! I will, however, cop to loving the silk bomber jacket, though not how they’ve sewn it up here (was the fabric picked out in the dark?!). I’ve been absolutely lusting after Papercut Patterns’ Rigel since it was released.
I’m going to go out on a limb. Normally, I choose to vote with my feet. But, your post and after watching Jeremy on TopGear, I’m inspired to fess up to my honest feelings.
Burda plus usually feels like someone size 2 is designing for those of us size 16 and up.
Like a straight, lanky shaped person is designing for curves they never had and don’t desire.
The fashions feel so disjointed and as though they could care less about dressing a larger sized woman or one who is very curvy.
It feels like they are embarrassed by us and just throw fabric at the model to see where it will stick, then they write words to say how “we” should dress ourselves, but the intent behind their words comes across as though they can hardly deign to write about “fat girls”. That’s what I feel when I read their words and look at their finished plus patterns. It may not be other’s feelings upon reading it, but the intent put into the words is always felt, just like how crappy one feels when reading an email received from a mad customer.
Frankly, all the curvy bloggers I follow sew way amazing things and dress themselves better than 99.9% of the Burda plus patterns I’ve seen over the last 14 years. I mean that as a compliment to the talents of the bloggers – I’m not quite finding the words I am feeling, that’s the best I can come up with at present.
I’ve been watching their patterns for a long time. Because of this, I stopped buying Burda full stop and moved over to Ottobre. At least they use models of all ages and sizes… heck I can see the wrinkles on the faces and I love it! The fashions are elegant, flattering, and wearable with Ottobre.
Although you say you can’t find the words, I completely understand your entire sentiment. I don’t know who designs these patterns but yes, the patterns are either super boring and have been done 1000x before, or they’re way over designed. It must be hard making new designs all the time but they do it easily with the straight sizes!
Exactly! I agree on all points. It must be a challenge to constantly be on the ball and reinvent, but I also agree it’s odd they can do it for smaller sizes. 🙂
I´ve never understood Burdas love for intensely busy prints. In absolutely every magazine I´ve read since I bought my first one in 2005 there have been at least a couple of designs where I had to check the technical drawings just to decipher what I was looking at. The weird front/side godet thingy dress here is one of those. Who in their right mind thinks it´s a good idea to present a sewing pattern where it´s impossible to see the design lines?
This whole collections takes the prints fascination to a whole new level, though. What were they thinking?
Harsh and hateful. Ganging up to pile on the insults is nothing short of bullying.
If you don’t like these patterns, risk your own money to start a pattern line that meets your narrow dictates. For your sake, I can only hope that your patterns won’t be reviewed by somebody like you who didn’t even sew up them up. And if you don’t want to start one, please explain why you are so special that the world owes you something that you won’t provide to yourself.
If you thought this would inspire others to create “better” choices, does shaming work on you? One would be pilloried for fat shaming but for you, the opposite is fair game. Why are you so special?
The rest of us aren’t stupid; the difficulty of designing patterns for heavier customers is extraordinarily difficult (and if you don’t think it is, then you try it) so why would we deliberately invest in the plus size market when it has the reputation of being gratuitously fractious and unkind? At this rate, things will never change. You do a grave disservice to plus size customers.
My understanding is that op eds are just that – opinions. Her opinion is that the lines Burda has in this collection are not flattering to most women with curves, and most of us agree.
Instead of challenging the home sewist to make her own patterns and sneering at her for not realizing how difficult it is, why not hold the so-called professionals to a higher standard? The curvy community has a right to demand that clothes for us have shape, and flattering shape at that, and not be considered edgy with the addition of a zipper or a flounce.
You call the review hateful and insulting. Many women would call the plus-sized collections offered by pattern companies hateful and insulting. This website represents a revolution, wherein curvy women no longer accept that we deserve less because we are too big to be loved.
Join the revolution. If you don’t like her opinion, add your own. Show us how it’s done.
Best regards.
Review posts poking fun at the latest Burda offerings are a standard theme in the sewing blogosphere. Usually, these posts are by non-plus sized sewists who pick apart the non-plus patterns. Why should Burda Plus’s offerings escape this treatment? Plus, why can’t we, as the target audience have an opinion about what they’re offering?
Michelle – obviously, we should be happy at whatever they throw at us, of course, and be greatful that they undertook the “extraordinarily difficult” task. /s
I’m not sure what OP thought we all do when we sew for ourselves, if not design for curvier bodies?
Gosh, anonymous coward certainly picked an apropos name. So kudos for that!
But yeah, even people who love Burda snark on the lastest mag. Its like a sport in the blogosphere. And this was hardly mean-spirited. It was funny!
And, Mary, I would LOVE a combined art show, opera, and weight lifting contest. I love to admire art, cringe after more than 5 minutes of opera, have no artistic talent, and can dead lift for reps over 100 pounds unspotted! Bring on the Modrians and barbells, pass some wine and cheese and get a soprano to sing an aria or 2 and I. AM. THERE.
And wow! What a cop out! EVERY TIME a plus or curvy sewist comments on the lack of patterns or the oddity of design features, someone pops out of the woodwork to say “go start a company yourself!” And you you know what? Some of us would probably love to, but can’t because we lack skills, money, time, etc. Because starting a new business is just so stinkin’ easy (eyeroll)
And CSC controllers, PLEASE work on changing the colors. The typeface color as I write is so faint that I can barely see what I’m writing. Its making me get a headache and my right eye is twitching in response.
We are currently in the process of hiring a person to do this in CSS for us 🙂
Thanks! Because I’m really trying to get involved– this is a great idea– but my vision is really tested.
Wha…?
I hope it is clear that my confusion lies with anonymous coward’s rant, not Mary’s excellent post!
Love,
Gratuitously Fractious and Unkind Jan
When did it become “bullying” for a consumer to review a product and express dissatisfaction? She paid $12 something for a book of patterns none of which I would be caught dead in, fat, skinny or in between. Ok, maybe that last pencil skirt with the zip but other than that Burda has been entirely too reliant on the “dressed up track suit” when they apparently can’t think of anything else to design for years. I don’t necessarily agree that it’s just for their plus size designs because I’ve seen it in their smaller sizes too but I do agree they’re not going to know we don’t like it if NO ONE TELLLS THEM! It’s not bullying, it’s free market research from which Burda should be happy to benefit. And they should give her back $12.
This made me laugh so much! That and the text under the sweatshirts with zippers: “a zipper makes this lazy day Jersey Top edgy and cute!” Because wearing an over-sized sweatshirt is boring, but a zipper makes it acceptable and cute? No. No. No. I don’t want to hide my curves under layers and have people remark: “I love the zipper!” If they aren’t loving my curves, I’m not sewing up the right things!
Also: Tails?! On a superhero?! Edna Mode says, “NO CAPES!”
5 points for the awesome and very apt reference to The Incredibles!
Ohmygoodness! I just browsed through the sneak peak of future offerings from this colletion! What is with those facial expressions??!?! What are the models supposed to be thinking? “I’m so confused about why I am holding this glass of milk!” “Hahaha! Did you see that guy trip as he came out the door?” “Watch me as I tame this fierce, face-eating butterfly! Ha!”
I would suggest that the tails are actually misplaced or disguised capes… But even my kids know from the Incredibles, “No capes dahling!”
Hhahaa, we’re thinking the same. NO CAPES!
Absolutely hilarious!
Oh my god, I’m laughing my ass off over here. I had pretty much the same reaction to this collection when browsing through the latest magazine. Hideous. Great post though, actually had to wipe tears of laughter away.
OMG I couldn’t stop laughing… Briliant post, you nailed it! This Burda collection is absolutely hidious, it reminded me of the eighties with bands like WHAM and Bananarama, Lot’s of prints in Neon colours, why o why curtainflaps on curvy hips and that dress with te atachable cuffs and colar remindes me of a sour sixty-year-old batchelorette, the only thing missing is a perl neklace…
THANK YOU !
in germany there is no alternative to the magazine of burda…it’ difficult to get patterns in curvy size…
and burda is often present the same…silky satin stretchy wetchy for business days in the office.
but i don’t work at the office. i had kids,cats and im a working mum with a big garden.. i don’t need
these patterns…
Thank you for your review.. it makes my often laugh and i agree with you !
greetings from germany
stella
Funny review, I enjoyed it immensely! I have to say that as a newbie coming to terms with curves and bumps and not trying to hide them most of the collection was, at best, scary. I have read so much good advice on blogs recently I am astounded that they would just release this without doing the same. Perhaps they think they know better. My final and main gripe about it all is that the model still doesn’t really have curves like real women. For the life of me I can’t picture the sideways mermaid fishtail looking good hanging from real, curvy hips. I eagerly await one of you sewists making it and proving me wrong.
I wonder if the tails are to help her leap gracefully from rooftop to rooftop, if she finds she doesn’t have time to undress before chasing some bad guy?
O dear, the Burda stylist on duty went a little overboard! Laurence’s link is for the fall/winter special Plus issue, which looks like it’s completely filled with repeat patterns from regular issues. Burda assumes we don’t notice that? Ha!
I’m both laughing and feeling slightly nauseous adter perusing the images in your fantastic review! I have a bit of a loathing for visible zips and Burda have not only created hideous items of clothing but they have adorned them with zips and weird flappy bits.
This is why I only buy Burda magazine occasionally. All it’s offerings vary so considerably! I liked your review, but honestly don’t like any of these patterns. The only ones I would make are the drawstring waist pants either in a light printed fabric or as exercise pants, but I’m fairly sure I have a pattern like that already. Fingers crossed for something a little more elegant, next time!
I like most of the patterns (bar the dresses) based on the line drawings and they are very ‘on trend’ here right now. But that styling is hideous and your comments are brilliantly funny (and true).
Yesterday I was considering making the sweatshirt but putting zips on both sides, handy if I get an itch on both shoulders, plus would give me another way out of the garment!
The next issue garments seem ok, one of the dresses is lovely!
The misplaced tails are crazy! But I like the floral bomber jacket…not the one with the stripes. I see it for casual wear that doesn’t have to be athletic grey. But most pieces are way off the mark.
Lmao till I hurt!!! the one shoulder zip sweatshirt review was so on point!
you are so funny but you are 100% on the mark, you can bet a plus size person did not design these. #burdaplus
Burda sure likes to amaze us with gorgeous patterns in one run and then give us horrid outfits to laugh about the next. Are you sure you don’t need a mismatched track jacket and a skirt with an abundance of zips? Glad I didn’t buy this magazine…
Maybe the tail can also be used as a cape?
Is breakdancing back? Because that would explain a lot.
To be fair, Burda’s zeitgeist is all about the inconsistency. You’ll get a run of collections that are pretty/racy/practical/classic…and then one that channels Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. Or Bananarama. Or that scene with Scarlet O’hara and her curtains. And while you are looking around for that shark that they jumped because you’re in the mood for sushi, they put the cart back right back on the rails, as with that other Burda plus collection you linked to, which has that gorgeous burgundy dress with that oh-so-fabulous neckline… (Pure Liz Taylor, before the scary hair and the White Diamonds…)
Yikes!!! That Godet dress……it reminds me of 1980s Easter Dresses. I don’t understand the overload of floral print. And the two zipper dress??? Why?!?!
OMG I just snorted my coffee up my nose!!! Still laughing!
I think my eyes are bleeding.
You are just the best. That is all.
ROTFLMAO
So glad to see I wasn’t the only one wondering what the heck Burda had been drinking or smoking before they came up with this collection. You put it wonderfully!
Oh, how I have laughed while reading this! You are SO right about these designs. I can’t stand the hi/lo hems of late and want to even them up, so a prehensile tail is just not gonna happen for this chick. Looks like the dress is melting off of her hot right side! Dear Lord!
I thought I was the only one who hated hi/lo hems… of course my name is Jan also…hmmm 🙂
Hi-lo tops: how to draw attention to the exact area that most women hate by drawing a half circle around it.
Yes best review EVER!!!! I actually deleted my Burda email subscribtion.
So pleased I replaced it with the Curvy Collective 🙂
I agree that most of these are head-scratching at best (that weird dress with the side drape?), but I’ll play devil’s advocate and defend a couple of them. The “luxe” trackpants and floral track/bomber jacket are very on-trend and everywhere right now. Seriously–go search for them on pinterest. I made up the very-similar HotPatterns version of the track pant in a rayon challis, and I really like them.
I wish I didn’t, but I kinda like that shoulder seam zipper on the sweatshirt. It’d be great for retrieving an errant bra strap that’s always slipping off my shoulder!
Yay first commenbt ! Ahem 🙂 .
I agree that some of the offerings are lol-worthy. I think birds were trying to present us with sporty-chic or whatever that trend is for gym items of clothing to be done in luxe fabrics is called sporty-luxe? Idk?. I am glad they included the blouson/athletic/bomber jacket cos I’ve some fabric squirrelled away for just such an enterprise and its taken the need to grade another pattern like the Rigel bomber by papercut also quite like the quilted sweatshirt bit like Charity chic’s offering though hers features fun animal faces for the quilted part. Godet dress however god no! (Sorry, couldn’t help myself)
Whoops not the first comment and also birds not birds!
Best. Review. Ever.
Agreed!